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Legal Antics 
Chronicling legal humor-- because let's face it-- lawyers take themselves far too seriously and the law is damn funny if you look at it through the right lens.
Post Frequency: 2.5/day Last Entry: August 08, 2011 at 07:55:00 Recent Entries: 535
By Nicole Black, Esq.
Go to Legal Antics, find other Law Humor blogs, or browse all law blogs.
Answering machine hell
Posted on June 01, 2010Image by Kichigai Mentat via FlickrThe following is one of the funnier stories from my tenure as an assistant Public Defender. I was assigned to represent a guy with a long misdemeanor record on some sort of small charge--a petit...
Well this guy's creative...
Posted on May 26, 2010Cute lawyer seeking very attractive girl needing free Green Card - 31 (Midtown East) Date: 2010-05-22, 4:39PM EDT Reply To This Post The title pretty much says it all I guess, but that is what I am looking for. I...
From what I know of cops...probably both.
Posted on May 25, 2010Image via WikipediaWhen I think about you I . . . Public Defender (to witness) - Just to clarify, were the police officers touching themselves or touching someone else? (Via On the Record in Cook County.)
Any Star Trek reference is a winner in my book.
Posted on May 17, 2010Image via Wikipedia Spock, can you hear me? JUDGE: Is there anything else you would like to say before I pass sentence? DEFENDANT: Yes, Kirk to Enterprise- Beam me up. Via Overheard in Court
Gee Mister, you sure look nice in those bike shorts.
Posted on May 17, 2010Image by richardmasoner via FlickrOver at one of my other blogs, Sui Generis, I'm occasionally posting stories from my years as an Assistant Public Defender. Here's one that's pretty funny, in my humble opinion. During my first year as an...
Episode #9: Keep track of your time using Chrometa, which offers time tracking software for lawyers
Posted on May 17, 2010Image by kylemac via Flickr I've just released a new lawtechTalk episode that you can watch for FREE. Episode #9 (Part 1 & Part 2) features, and is sponsored by Chrometa, which offers time tracking software for attorneys. Part 1,...
I couldn't make it to the end of this one. I feel unclean.
Posted on May 12, 2010'DADDY/DAUGHTER' role play with handsome, generous lawyer 'Dad' - m4w - 64 (New Jersey, Rockland Cnty, NY, near Pa ) Date: 2010-04-16, 11:41AM EDT Reply To This Post PROLOGUE; A very recent and very successful 'Daddy/Daughter' scenario just mutually concluded...
Oh my.
Posted on April 28, 2010Whip it Good Plaintiff's Lawyer - Your Honor, the plaintiff is entitled to the proceeds from the Works In Progress. Defendant's Lawyer - Judge, the contract clearly allows the defendant to keep the WIP proceeds. Judge - You can use...
They taught us this particular legal defense in Copyright 101
Posted on April 26, 2010Hat tip: Moonbuggy
A man with beauty and brains. Pinch me. I must be dreaming.
Posted on April 21, 2010Beauty/Brains: Successful Lawyer, Sexy Model Looking 4 HOT LATIN GIRL Date: 2010-04-08, 8:41PM PDT Reply To This Post If you are looking for the rare combination of beauty and brains, you have found it. I am an intelligent attorney who...
Why dueling is better than lawyers.
Posted on April 20, 2010You can read the article that accompanies this chart here at Cracked.com.
The Legal iPad Blog & Facebook Page
Posted on April 20, 2010The Legal iPad Blog & Facebook Page Image via CrunchBase I've started a new blog for lawyers and others who use the iPad in their business. It's called the Legal iPad. You can find it here and subscribe to its...
It's gotta be a joke because real lawyers don't cry.
Posted on April 19, 2010The auditor asks the man: "You lead an amazingly extravagant lifestyle yet you have no job. How do you expect us to believe you're not hiding something from us?" So a man and his lawyer are called by the IRS...
An oh-so-practical judge--my favorite kind.
Posted on April 13, 2010VENIREMAN: Your honor, I wish to be excused from jury duty because my wife is about to get pregnant. DISTRICT ATTORNEY: Your Honor, I believe the panel member means his wife is about to give birth. JUDGE: The panel member...
He said it, not me.
Posted on April 07, 2010A law-related joke, for your amusement today: Slanderous Statement A woman was being questioned in a court trial involving slander. "Please repeat the slanderous statements you heard, exactly as you heard them," instructed the lawyer. The witness hesitated...
Dude-just buy a few pairs at Victoria's Secret & call it a day.
Posted on April 06, 2010Overworked and alone - m4w - 28 (LA) Date: 2010-04-03, 10:20PM PDT Reply To This Post To much time filing legal briefs and not enough time playing with a woman's panties. I am 28, 6' 2", and a former soccer...
That's so unfair! They also say "objection" sometimes.
Posted on April 05, 2010A lot of education Sheriff - I am going to go to law school so I can become a State's Attorney and say, "So then what happened?" Via On the Record in Cook County
Webinar: Preview of my New Book "Social Media for Lawyers" at 4/6 1pm EST
Posted on April 05, 2010Tomorrow, Tuesday April 6th at 1 pm EST Avvo is hosting a preview webinar of "Social Media for Lawyers: the Next Frontier," my new book co-authored with Carolyn Elefant that will be published later this month by the American Bar...
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Did I harass someone?
Oh, yes. This can be taken in as so many things, especially since you had testif...
How to evict a roommate?
First, in most jurisdictions "self-help" is not a remedy available to any party ...
I have worked for this employer for only three weeks. The employer makes up his own rules as to what he chooses to report for the purpose of property taxes. He tells me to "let them come after us". He defines Entertain
He arrogantly insists, "let them come after us." Well, if you are invo...
This has happened 3 or 4 times a month now- they have turned the electric off 2 days consecutively, the water off about 9 or 10 times now, and our heat has broken 5 times (once it would not shut off, and we were forced t
i say stick with the apartment. eventually, everything possible will be replaced...
The company I worked for forced me to quit instead of dealing with someone harassing me, what can I do?
Look up CONSTRUCTIVE DISCHARGE...................this looks like what happened t...
#1 Online Legal Resource
On 08-25 at 15:46PM
Acute perpendicular parking #NYPD #NYFD
On 08-18 at 22:18PM
Parallel parking gone bad. Too much gas UES NYC
On 08-18 at 21:41PM
UES NYC
On 08-18 at 21:25PM
Twitter suspends journalist critical of broadcast partner's coverage on dubious grounds @guyadams #nbcfail #twitterfail
On 07-30 at 17:57PM
Model example of 1st Amendment suppression by the People of New York City's Michael Bloomberg #OWS #NYPD
On 07-12 at 21:07PM
AG Holder lackadaisical on Operation in our Sites domain name seizures & RIAA lobbied free speech suppression @dajaz1
On 06-08 at 22:44PM
Why is the Catholic Church going to court over Obama contraception policy? @NewYorker commentary
On 05-31 at 10:08AM
Monks sue Louisiana for right to sell caskets made from forrest destroyed by Katrina
On 05-31 at 07:47AM
Are the abortion ultrasound laws headed for the Supreme Court?
On 05-15 at 21:52PM
Did I harass someone?
Oh, yes. This can be taken in as so many things, especially since you had testif...
How to evict a roommate?
First, in most jurisdictions "self-help" is not a remedy available to any party ...
I have worked for this employer for only three weeks. The employer makes up his own rules as to what he chooses to report for the purpose of property taxes. He tells me to "let them come after us". He defines Entertain
He arrogantly insists, "let them come after us." Well, if you are invo...
This has happened 3 or 4 times a month now- they have turned the electric off 2 days consecutively, the water off about 9 or 10 times now, and our heat has broken 5 times (once it would not shut off, and we were forced t
i say stick with the apartment. eventually, everything possible will be replaced...
The company I worked for forced me to quit instead of dealing with someone harassing me, what can I do?
Look up CONSTRUCTIVE DISCHARGE...................this looks like what happened t...
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