Landlord Tenant dispute

I live in NC and we are renting a 2 bedroom apartment for $800 a month. We have not been late or anything at all since we moved in.We have utilities included in our apartment. The landlord is constantly telling us to cut off lights - so much so that she actually came over tonight and got into my husbands face telling us we were underminding her because we had left a side porch light on that we did not even realize was on. She told us to just give her our notice. I don't want to do that because then we would be breaking the lease and be held responsible for paying the remainder of the lease. But I also do not want to live somewhere that we will be harrassed about leaving on lights. She always says she pays the light bill so she can dictate to us what lights we can leave on.Technically we pay way more in rent because utilities are included-so we actually do pay the bill - that is the way I see it. She also put a lock box over our thermostat inside our apartment and she dictates the temp inside the apartment. That would be okay if we were not freezing in our apartment in the mornings and at night, but she is keeping it on 65 - when it is 30 degrees outside at night- even though we have requested that the heat be turned up a bit. Are we in the wrong? Is there anything that we can do?

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