Law Humor

Bernie's Best

Ira, dear-

I've decided not to attend the event on Monday; I simply have no interest in yet another media circus.

But, I called David Neff at Trillion, and after I insisted that the outstanding bill could be satisfied by another mention on Bernie's Blog, and perhaps we'd give him a discount on ad space, he had Tanya pick out a lovely ensemble for Bernie.

They're overnighting a Kiton charcoal suit (make sure you take off the $7200 price tag, we don't want to offend anyone) , a powder blue shirt and a lovely Ferragamo tie. I think he should wear the Gucci loafers without the tassels. If anyone starts throwing shoes, those things might poke an eye out.

The package is being sent to your office. Please be on the lookout for it.

He'll look smashing as always, but please make sure that nobody smashes him; I promised David that the suit would be returned after the event.

Speaking of events, the boys don't think it's appropriate for them to make an appearance while their father is making his appearance. They know that he never likes being upstaged. So, Fred Wilpon said he'd help sell the front row seats that you had reserved for them. Mark said that anybody that submits a donation of $50 or more in the tip box to the right would be entered into a pool and the winners will be selected on Sunday night.

Speaking of pools, that sweet little girl from FinAlternatives.com is apparently creating some type of pool for people to guess what that wonderful, handsome and considerate Judge Denny will be sentencing Bernie to. She said that you said that it's perfectly legal, but I think the entire idea is in bad taste. So do the boys.

We all think that if there are so many people that want to "bet" on what the sentence is going to be, we should be paid a royalty. After all, its our brand name that their using!

Please let me know your thoughts this morning. My understanding is that this contest is going to start before lunch time and we want to make sure that there's an agreement in place before it does.

R.A.M.

Full post as published by Bernard Madoff on June 25, 2009 (boomark / email).