Florida

SFL Friday -- People In Glass Houses.....

Posted on October 22, 2010
I'm channeling my inner proverb-spouting Magistrate Judge Goodman, but here I think it really fits:A former colleague and one-time girlfriend now tells the Washington Post that the Supreme Court justice was "obsessed with porn" as well as the bodies of his female coworkers...

You Hardly Talk To Me Anymore...

Posted on October 21, 2010
Meet and Confer You Dummies                                                              When I come through the door at the end of the day...

I Propose That We Honor Steve Zack!

Posted on October 21, 2010
One thing I think the world could use right now, and everyone is pretty much in agreement with this, is more events honoring my buddy Steve Zack.Did you know he's the new ABA President?Oh I kid Steve, but seriously there is DEFCON 1 food truck-level media saturation of his laudable ABA activities and we may want to look around and see if anyone else is doing anything of any interest whatsoever...

The Court: (Yelling at Mr. Klock) SIT

Posted on October 20, 2010
Biased Judge Objection                                                              I've often wondered, in the toe-tapping lawyer case before Magistrate Judge Brown, when the s%&t would hit the fan, when all hail would break loose, when the "thin veneer of civilization" (to use a favorite Edgar Rice Burroughs phrase) would lift and more primitive impulses start to emerge, overcoming the good intentions of all involved and just tearing the whole danged thing apart...

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3d DCA Watch -- Down the Rabbit Hole!

Posted on October 20, 2010
 And into the bunker, sweet Alice:Down, down, down. Would the fall never come to an end! `I wonder how many miles I've fallen by this time?' she said aloud. `I must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth. Let me see: that would be four thousand miles down, I think--' (for, you see, Alice had learnt several things of this sort in her lessons in the schoolroom, and though this was not a very good opportunity for showing off her knowledge, as there was no one to listen to her, still it was good practice to say it over) `--yes, that's about the right distance--but then I wonder what Latitude or Longitude I've got to?' (Alice had no idea what Latitude was, or Longitude either, but thought they were nice grand words to say...

David J. Stern: Living the American Dream!

Posted on October 19, 2010
Remember the old joke about the Army -- visit exotic places, meet interesting people, and kill them?I'm reminded of that by this in depth profile of foreclosure mill maven David J. Stern, who is ably cast by Jeff Tew as the embodiment of the American dream:?He started from scratch and has built a wonderful legal practice and has made a lot of money,? Tew said...

Glenn Garvin Doesn't Read His Own Newspaper!

Posted on October 19, 2010
It's very hard to keep with with our local curmudgeonly TV critic cum 60s "silent majority" libertarian philosopher at large.First he was handling the entire Herald newsroom.Then he was apparently editing the New York Times.Now it appears he stopped reading his own paper:For all their frothing fulmination, neither the lawyers nor politicians nor journalists have been able to come up with any credible stories of people losing their homes despite faithfully paying their mortgages...

Judge Tjoflat: "I Was Wron......"

Posted on October 18, 2010
There's a surprising lack of internet information regarding Fonzie from Happy Days' inability to say "I was wrong."Here's the best link I could come up with, which isn't much.But if you watch the above clip starting around 1:45, you'll remember what I mean...

"Taj Mahal" Courthouse Built At Bunker's Expense?

Posted on October 18, 2010
The scandal involving the 1st DCA's "Taj Mahal" courthouse continues, as politicians and administrators play political football in light of Alex Sink's recent audit.The latest pushback is from the head of the state agency in charge of the construction of state buildings, Linda South, who says basically that the 1st DCA judges constantly meddled with the project:She said there was a point, early enough in the project, to "put a fence around the design of the courthouse...

Is Glenn Garvin Now Editing the New York Times?

Posted on October 16, 2010
We've seen what happens when Glenn Garvin takes over an entire newspaper.But Garvin's appetite, not sated, has apparently led him to edit stories for the Grey Lady herself.How else to explain this whopper from an otherwise superlative article on the foreclosure mills that infest our state:In an interview last month, Mr...

"I Said Good Day, Sir!"

Posted on October 15, 2010
Dont Waste My Time Again                                                              Do any of you come here for legal analysis and opinion?Judging from your search terms, let's leave that question unanswered...

"There's Gambling Going On Here"?

Posted on October 15, 2010
Jennifer Love Hewitt - New Music - More Music VideosI'm feeling pretty morose over the general political, economic, and legal climate we find ourselves in nowadays.We may soon have Scott as our Governator and Rubio our Senator.That's depressing enough...

SFL Friday -- He Went Out Ant-Hunting With His Elephant and Gun....

Posted on October 15, 2010
I can't believe we made it to Friday.Let's get right to it:I Scribd this so you can click on the link, but Magistrate Judge Brown has scheduled a hearing on whether or not the plaintiffs in the toe-tapping lawyer case can unilaterally cancel a Court-ordered hearing...

3d DCA Watch -- Exciting New Changes in the Bunker!

Posted on October 14, 2010
Slim pickings inside the concrete hall of justice, kids.Maybe it's because while the 1st DCA fends off calls by Governor Crist and Alex Sink to have the JQC investigate its letter-writing Chief Judge, our own Robed Ones have been delighting in a new coffee pot in the attorney's lounge which - rumor has it -- apparently includes genuine vending machine paper coffee cups with a wild card on the bottom!Extravagant, even decadent perhaps, but the denizens who toil inside the bunker deserve nothing less...

You Don't Need A Weatherman to Know Which Way the Wind Blows.

Posted on October 13, 2010
``As I predicted, it appears the 3d DCA opinion overturning Florida's gay adoption ban will not be further appealed:It's clear that the District Court of Appeal decision is of statewide application, and it will be binding on all trial courts across the state,'' Sheldon said...

Let's Have A Meet and Confer!

Posted on October 12, 2010
Has anyone heard about that case involving the (alleged) toe-tapping lawyer?Well for you junkies and obsessives, in rolled the defendants' response to an attempt by the plaintiffs to cancel an evidentiary hearing (not the toe-tapping one, which I believe is still on)...

Bring Back Lew Freeman!

Posted on October 12, 2010
I have noticed a distinct decline in interesting metaphors and wild analogies since Lew Freeman went to jail.For example, bad karma is catching up with David J. Stern, but look at how his attorney Jeff Tew responds to it all:The whistleblower's testimony, released last week, is a jarring account alleging widespread fraud and criminal activity at the law firm...

Tell Us Your Favorite Firm Weekend Story!

Posted on October 11, 2010
Ahh firm weekends, the chance to bond with people you hate -- what could possibly go wrong?Today's a quasi-holiday, so if you're in please feel free to use this space to share and/or make up a really juicy firm weekend tale (though it helps if it's at least plausible or partially grounded in reality)...

Help Buju Banton Pay His Lawyer (What's His Name Again?)

Posted on October 11, 2010
I always say lawyers should get paid for good work.That's why like-minded citizens can band together and help Buju defend himself (wire instructions included!):Markus told the Observer that the cost of the first trial has taken a huge financial toll on the artiste and asked fans, friends and supporters of the artiste to assist in any way they can...

CHiPs Actor Suddenly Famous Again.

Posted on October 08, 2010
Here in the SD FL we've had our fair share of celebrity lawsuits -- Paris Hilton, Kanye -- but local SEC chief Eric Bustillo has set his sights on the white whale himself, former CHiPs star Larry Wilcox: An actor who starred as a cop in the hit 1970's television show, "CHiPs" is one of several penny stock promoters the Securities and Exchange Commission has charged with securities fraud...

SFL Friday -- Grow Old With Me.

Posted on October 08, 2010
Rumpole notes that tomorrow would be John Lennon's 70th birthday.I've spent the last few days listening to the newly remastered versions of John's last two albums, the one he formally released shortly before his death (Double Fantasy) and the rough cuts he was working on that Yoko released posthumously (Milk and Honey)...

Judge Seitz Locates "Kingdom of God" At Sentencing Hearing!

Posted on October 08, 2010
Apparently this idiot defendant ripped off Medicare, blew $60k on a fancy dinner at The Forge and then attempted to describe himself to Judge Seitz as generous (maybe to Shareef Malnik!), prompting the Judge to say this:"The kingdom of God is not in fancy cars or $60,000 dinners,'' Seitz told the 38-year-old Marquez, whose parents, wife and others attended the hearing...

Judges Behaving Badly (Again).

Posted on October 07, 2010
Readers know I detest excessive obsequiousness toward our judges -- of course they deserve respect and deference, but so often they are treated by attorneys as Kings and Queens when we are in front of them, yet mercilessly mocked and derided the minute they are out of our presence (this never happens at judicial receptions btw!)...

Fort Lauderdale Attorney Jim Lewis Wants to Make Us (Legal) Potheads!

Posted on October 07, 2010
Well maybe I'm not reading that quite right, but my eyes are a little puffy at the moment and I've still got some residuals from last night's Dylan concert:Relatively unknown as a candidate in the race to become Florida?s next Attorney General, Fort Lauderdale attorney Jim Lewis has announced he?s calling for Florida to take a step beyond simply decriminalizing marijuana for medical use, saying in press release Tuesday that he will seek the legalization of marijuana (in what is widely considered to be the state that ranks number one for highly potent, indoor-grown pot) should he be elected...

Lawyer of the Day!

Posted on October 06, 2010
Let's see, he's brash, wears pin stripes, likes cigars, race horses and has lion head statutes.Sound like anyone you know?Meet Mike Laurato:It might sound redundant to say Laurato is a civil trial lawyer who sues. Part of the job description, right?He battles insurance companies that turn down claims for sinkholes and stolen cars...

Tea Partiers Move To Sanction Each Other!

Posted on October 06, 2010
When last we checked in on the local tea party-on-tea party battle raging before Judge Marra, plaintiff's counsel filed an emergency motion to withdraw and there were somewhat odd cloak-and-dagger allegations flying back and forth.On September 7, the Court granted the motion to withdraw and gave the plaintiffs until October 1 to find new counsel...

3d DCA Watch -- Salter v. Cope Smackdown!

Posted on October 06, 2010
Well I got ready for my deposition this morning the way I often do -- by rewatching Paul Williams' sensitive, nuanced portrayal of a badly misunderstood romantic in Phantom of the Paradise, then downing two shots of kettle-corn gin and heading to the office and just flat-out wingin' it...

Glenn Garvin Hat Trick!

Posted on October 05, 2010
It's long overdue, but the Herald has finally let go of all its reporters and editors and decided to just let Glenn Garvin handle everything.Today Garvin has no less than THREE blockbuster articles in a paper that typically has no more than five to seven articles total on a Tuesday...

Bilzin To Have "Biometric Security Protocols"!

Posted on October 05, 2010
Oh I love all the euphemisms for a good old-fashioned canoodling, but Bilzin has upped the ante, even for me:The firms says it also has new ?biometric security protocols? to ensure authorized access to offices. A spokesman for the firm confirmed that this means handprint or fingerpint ID systems, something like Walt Disney World has at its front gates now...

Judge Moreno Now Has Less (None?) of an Interesting New Case!

Posted on October 05, 2010
Back in August we reported on hot Latino soap star (Glenn, are you listening?) William Levy's $10 million suit against an LA attorney involving an alleged extortion plot, oral sex, and venereal disease.In other words, nothing compared to what certain senior federal district judges are allegedly up to nowadays!The case, brought by Ralph Patino, was pending before Judge Moreno...

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