Criminal Law

Nothing like...

Posted on November 10, 2008
The Bad:Driving 120 miles round trip every, single dayLosing all leverage in a case when a new OPEN case against your client is located at the last minute (which your client, of course, neglected to inform you about)YOUR client telling character wits AGAINST the complaining witness not to talk to your investigator because he is scared he will "lose his girl forever" if I call her a fucking violent liar at trialTrying to explain to a client why we have no defense in his loaded firearm case where he drove up to a law enforcement facility, handed over a fist-full of bullets, informed them that there was a gun in his car (parked right outside), and gave consent to searchWorking late the day before a holidayThe Good:The perfect manicureA day off in the middle of the weekHearing law school war stories from your baby brother Brand new, perfectly lovely knee-high suede bootsListening to your little nephew tell you he loves youOBAMA WINS!!!!

Dilemma

Posted on October 31, 2008
Met a client on 14/30 for trial (for you non-law nerds out there, that means that he is on day 14 of the 30 day period, day 30 being the day he has a right to be brought to trial by). He is in custody. He has 7 probation violations, one is a felony, and one open misdemeanor case...

Why you should always be represented by an attorney

Posted on October 30, 2008
Yesterday in court a client previously represented by my office came in to court and decided to represent himself to ask the court for an extension on the classes he was ordered to attend.Big mistake.The judge, not one for giving more than one extension throughout the life of a case, took him into custody...

This is why you don't leave your feet to make a hit!!

Posted on October 05, 2008
Fuck! Anquan Boldin is now out indefinitely after having facial surgery to repair a broken bone he suffered as a result of ass-hat extraordinaire Eric Smith's jacked up hit last week.Hope the guy gets back this season. He is an incredible talent.

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Death Penalty Op-Ed

Posted on October 05, 2008
Here is the link.http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/commentary/la-oe-woodford2-2008oct02,0,6847008.storyHere is the text:As the warden of San Quentin, I presided over four executions. After each one, someone on the staff would ask, "Is the world safer because of what we did tonight?"We knew the answer: No...

All I Want For Christmas

Posted on October 05, 2008
That is a fucking diamond she is holding!! OMG! It is 478 carats. It is D in color (for those of you not in the know, that is the highest color rating for a diamond. It is colorless!!). It has a FLAWLESS center that experts in Antwerp believe could yield up to a 150-carat round! I am all tingly just thinking about it!!

Things I Love

Posted on October 04, 2008
Buffed nails versus polishedBig Sugar Bakery "Chococcino" cupcakes Pedicures with OPI "Yoga-ta Get This Blue" My new Michael Kors Iona cross strap (mine are purple)My delicious new Cole Haan handbag. Gunmetal grey, and it is much darker than it looks in the pic...

That's cool, um, I guess

Posted on September 29, 2008
Ok, so a bunch of computers found a 13-million digit prime number.Hooray!! Let's hear it for computer nerds!I just want to know something...WHAT THE FUCK SIGNIFICANCE DOES THIS HAVE??Someone, please explain the necessity to discover a number, which if printed out would stretch 30 miles, is a prime number?It reminds me of a quote by Strong Bad: "Popular Science?! No such thing, man...

Boldin recovering after hit

Posted on September 29, 2008
Anquan Boldin is out of the hospital, resting at home after the nasty helmet-to-helmet shot he took in Sunday's game. Jet's safety Eric Smith was given a $50K fine and will serve a one game suspension.Glad to hear that Boldin is doing well. When I saw him hit the turf, clearly unconscious, I had to hold my breath...

Kill The Messenger

Posted on September 28, 2008
I saw the new Chris Rock HBO special last night. As always, the man was hilarious.

R.I.P. Paul Newman

Posted on September 27, 2008
January 26, 1925 - September 26, 2008.

I made it

Posted on September 26, 2008
Well, I have driven 600 miles back and forth to work this week. After 5 days of waiting my computer was finally hooked into the network. And like a gift to me, one of my favorite bad movies is on (Thirteen Ghosts). I guess with the way the economy is going I am lucky to even have a job and a roof over my head...

Blah

Posted on September 24, 2008
What is it with crappy tv these days? Has anyone seen this "Fringe" show on Fox? It is effing horrible!!

Day 3

Posted on September 24, 2008
Ugh, it is not even 6:00am, why am I awake?? Oh yeah because I have a new assignment that is 60 miles from my house. Ah, good times.Except it isn't good times. Not at all. I am exhausted. I do not know how on earth I will be able to keep this up. What is worse is that when I mentioned that I needed time off (two Fridays) in October to travel to two weddings I was told it might not be doable...

What the EFF?!?!??!

Posted on September 22, 2008
Where has Sex and The City gone from my OnDemand?!?!?!? I need it back.Yeah, so what I have seen every episode multiple times. So what I can watch every episode on OnDemand back to back??I need it back, NOW!! This is some bullshit.

Great Article

Posted on September 19, 2008
Read this, haters!

D is for Douchebag

Posted on September 16, 2008
DeSean Jackson is fucking dumb times ten for showboating his way right out of a touchdown tonight in the Philly @ Dallas game. The game was AMAZING, howev.Ok, so he went 6 catches for 110 yards, but no TD's for you, dummy.

OMFG

Posted on September 15, 2008
Sweet lord, but this new HBO show "True Blood" is awful, awful, awful.The acting is soooo bad. And, BTW, did they not have enough money to hire a decent dialect coach? The accents are horrifying.I am hating this show big time, but M. is insisting it is going to get better...

Name that quote

Posted on September 15, 2008
"You make it sound like it's some remote fucking experience in ancient history. Man, you don't leave the Agency."

In defense of Ed Hochuli

Posted on September 14, 2008
Alright, before people start calling for Ed Hochuli's head on a plate, let me just have a second.At full speed, I thought it was a fumble, too. They reviewed the play, he saw he was wrong, but his hands were completely tied by the rule and he couldn't overturn himself...

Woot woot!

Posted on September 14, 2008
I don't know how many times I will get to say this this season, but NINERS WIN!!!O'Sullivan had 321 yards! Clutch OT win for the Niners.After the dismal performance by OSU yesterday against USC, I needed some football glory.

Thanks Postsecret contributor

Posted on September 14, 2008
If more people only knew this.

Ugh...not good

Posted on September 13, 2008
Chris Wells is apparently out for the Ohio State v. USC game.

Judge if you will

Posted on September 10, 2008
The NKOTB, specifically Donnie Wahlberg, obsession has hit an all-time, unrequited, all-consuming high for me. Concert is a month away. I've gone insane. I am a grown woman. I am an attorney. I am a blockhead fo' life. Yeah, that's right. Deal with it.

Overheard at the bank

Posted on September 07, 2008
My hubby and I went to the bank to consolidate some bank accounts. We were helped by a woman who made us wait while she sat in front of us on hold with HER credit card company ironing out some problem with HER account. The awesome customer service did not end there:Her: Would you like to be an owner or a signer on this account, Ipse Dixit?Me: Well, what is the difference between the two?Her: (TOTALLY exasperated): An OWNER is an OWNER and a SIGNER is a SIGNER...

Overheard at work

Posted on September 05, 2008
I had to call the fire department to find out how to subpoena these paramedics for trial. This followed:Me: Hi, I'm Ipse Dixit from the Public Defender's office and I need to send out some subpoenas to two of your paramedics. Will you accept them by fax?Fireman Bob: You're a Public Defender?Me: Yes...

Only at the fair

Posted on September 05, 2008
Deep fried avacado?! Deep fried White Castle hamburgers?! This is wrong. Sick and wrong. Check out the other nasty deep fried foods you can get at the fair this year. I would try the deep fried apples, actually.

Whatever

Posted on August 22, 2008
So what!! I once had a client that I plead a probationary sentence at around 10:30am, released from custody at about 4:00pm, and was back in custody at 7:00pm for violating the same restraining order he plead to hours earlier.

Congrats Billy

Posted on August 20, 2008
My little brother just started law school (silly boy) and in his first week has passed his first milestone...reading Pennoyer v. Neff for civ pro.Ah, Pennoyer v. Neff. The memories. This was the FIRST case I briefed for law school. I think I read it 20 times trying to understand it...

Happy Birthday Robert Plant

Posted on August 20, 2008
He's 60! **(obviously not when this pic was taken)

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