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Madoff's Morning Briefing: Dopamine! Not Dope Are You!

Ira-You need to get hold of a gal named Sally Satel--She's a shrink with an MD degree from Brown and she just wrote a great article..Have one of your interns find it online. You can print it out, and I've got extra printer cartridges if you need them.

She's going to be one of our expert witnesses and she'll explain everything about my dopamine imbalance. Between that and the bath robes, I'm sure we'll be home free. Well, I am home free now...but I'm talking about keeping it that way.

Sure, lots of people are yapping about Ezra, Sonja, Walter, his boys, Sonny and Bob and wondering whether they were part of some "inner circle", when those people should be saying "What a dope are you?!"

And Ezra and the rest can say, "it was the dopamine!"

Next: on a more serious note--I was up all night watching the news stories about the US Airways flight out of LaGuardia that landed in the Hudson on my 52 inch flat panel on the den wall. All I can say is that Chelsey Sunnenberger, the pilot of that plane, is an amazing hero. And every one of the flight crew, and the hundreds of rescue workers should be given a ticker tape parade. I've got plenty of extra paper, some big shredding machines and I'm happy to contribute the ticker tape... Again--my hat's off to the US Airways crew, and all of the emergency responders that saved the passengers..the most amazing thing I've ever seen! Makes me proud to be a New York City tax paper--those emergency responders were fantastic...I only wish that I could have taken my yacht out there to help them... But its in the Bahamas right now..

Jodi-get that pilot's home phone number, I want to offer him a job to be our pilot!

Speaking of taxes and recoveries--I've told everyone that if given the opportunity, I can make my investors whole. Or most of them. I'll need Jodie, Frank, and Shana to help me, but its pretty simple really:

1. There's more than a few that already took out much more than they put in, and according to IRS, they can carry forward the loss of the phantom profits and deduct them against future gains until hell freezes over.

2. SIPC knows that many people can't produce copies of their initial deposits because they made them years ago. All you need to do is make a sworn statement on your claim form that you had more than $500k on deposit in each account. They're obligated to pay you.

So, many of you will have not only gotten back your principal, but you'll be able to get refunds on taxes paid for the past three years, AND you can carry forward the rest of the phantom profits and deduct them against future income.

(BTW--if any of you are being told by your broker at Merrill or another firm that they don't have records going back 20 years--that's bullshit. Its just too much of a pain for them to do it. They can do it, trust me.)

For Uncle Sam and my friends at SIPC--trust me--there's going to be lots of people that aren't going to want to file any requests for refunds on taxes they paid. And there's going to be lots of people that won't want to fill out SIPC forms... So when you think about, many people are going to be just as well as off as they were before they invested with me. Most are better off!!

And, if anyone needs a good lawyer or accountant that knows about this stuff--let me know..I heard from a CPA in Connecticut that knows about this stuff...His name is Sager. He sounds like a nice boy, but I don't know him personally.

Next topic: Thanks to the boys on the desk at BMIS for emailing over the CSFB report from yesterday..it makes it very clear that my split-strike strategy is perfectly real. Meanwhile, I also noticed that you guys are logging on to this blog every f--king day during trading hours...Excuse me, but you're still on the payroll, and you need to get off the damn internet and start booking trades!!

Finally: Yes, I've been to Switzerland plenty of times. But no, I don't remember meeting Marc Rich..Ruth, do you remember him??

Full post as published by Bernard Madoff on January 16, 2009 (boomark / email).