Law Humor

I learned it from this guy...here's a court transcript of his arraignment.  It made me laugh, but I feel a bit guilty for doing so. The defendant clearly has issues:

Judge Wilson explains, (this) "was a rather feeble attempt to have a formal arraignment" of a non compos mentis defendant "who twice invoked all the rights and privileges extended to him by Roe v. Wade. " (Hat tip:  Say What?)

Court: Mr. Defendant, I've asked your attorney to go over your indictment with you, and has he done so?

Defendant: Roe v. Wade. I was mugged by Alton Allen. (Long pause.)

Court: Okay. Has -

Defendant: I was onto a check-cashing racket going on at Polk's. So when they figured out I was onto it, they called the law on me. Alton just walked up and hit me in the fact. [sic] They threatened to shoot me with a gun and everything else.

Court(wisely): Okay.

Defendant: And when I lived at the Lufkin Donut Shop - the crack salesman living beside me -

Court: Excuse me. Would you be quiet, please? This is not a time for you to make a statement to the court, okay? This is a time for you to be advised of what you're charged with.

Defendant: I'm really not charged with anything. They just made it up. ... He hit me first and mugged me for 300 bucks.

Court: I understand that. He may very well have done so. And if you're found guilty of that offense ... it carries a range of punishment from two to 10 years in the penitentiary and up to a $10,000 fine.

Defendant: Roe v. Wade.

Court (wisely): Okay.

Defense Attorney: It's a plea of not guilty.