Law Students

Peace in the Motherland

By Andrea

It occurs to me today, reading LL and her commenters, that no one, not even once, has said in person or commented on my blog that there is anything wrong with my decision to have Becca when we did, graduate on time, and work full-time. People have sincerely asked me, with no critical subtext, if I miss her or what I'll do if we have another kid, etc. But no one has ever picked a Mommy War fight with me. I hadn't realized that until now.

It's probably the people we hang around with - which also explains why no one has ever given me any crap over the clients I defend, who are pretty unpopular types. Then again, weirdos pop up everywhere. I like to think it's because I am so incredibly awesome (in the literal sense) and intimidating, that potential critics just look at me and go, "Damm, I am not going to mess with her. Also, I'm a feminist now." But it's probably the people we hang around with.

Still, that means I have never had the catharsis of going off on some person who feels like throwing "I don't want my kid to be raised by someone else!!" around like a weapon. As the very happy child of a single mom...well, to change the saying a bit, I wish a momma WOULD. (Start with me, that is.) It's just like how if you have the misfortune of asking me what country my parents were born in when I'm in a bad mood, you might end up getting hit over the head with my WWII veteran grandfather.

Besides taking a maternity leave at some point, I'm not going to be a stay-at-home mom. It's not for me, we probably couldn't afford it if it were, and if we thought having a parent home really was necessary Dan and I would talk about it without assuming it's a woman thing. And although it'd be satisfying to fight about it, I'm glad all our friends and family just get it.

Full post as published by Peanut Butter Burrito on October 30, 2008 (boomark / email).