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Madoff's Morning Briefing

I'm thinking we're going to change the format here...I've been getting inundanted with requests to talk more about everything, so I think a morning briefing format is good. I'm a morning guy anyway..Right, Ruth?? Right, Julie??

There's lots of news to cover this morning, and before the idiotic feds tell the judge that aside from f--king interrogating the packages we send from the house, they should also be taking away my blackberry, I thought I'd put a few thoughts to paper.

1. CNBC's Jane Wells (using her blackberry too!) sent me a message and said that photo I posted "exaggerated her features." Janey: I don't think any of the 5000 people reading my blog every day were disappointed with your photo. Trust me on this. Its OK to exaggerate a bit. Look how well I've done!! Boats, houses, planes...Look at how George Bush did. Look at how well Dick Cheney did. Those two bums should have sent to jail on fraud charges a long time ago...So a little exaggeration is easily justified.

2. Aside from Janey, while scanning the morning jibber jabber in the newspapers, it looks like some news reporters are finally beginning to understand. Whether my good friend Steve Harbeck at SIPC understands is something else. Here's the point: a whole slug of people not only redeemed their entire principal over the years, but many ended up taking out twice what they put in. And a bunch of these people, took out plenty in the last year. That's what caused my firm to collapse.

What's the point?? The number of claims submitted should be a fraction of what everyone is kvetching about. My word of advice--and you can trust me; some of you that are putting in a claim for the $500k SIPC money (and that's $500k for each account at BMIS,) that already took out more than you put in are going to be put under a microscope.

But I wouldn't worry too much..Steve Harbeck blackberried me and said that SIPC ran out of microscopes last year, and the new ones that he ordered won't delivered for another two months. Something about the manufacturer going broke and having to lay off all of their workers due to the economy. I heard Steve loud and clear when he said "the first ones to submit claims will be the first ones paid..." See! SIPC uses FIFO accounting just like we did!!! Ira--are you taking notes on this??

What's even better is that UBS announced this morning that they're returning all of the money in off shore accounts that were held by US citizens.

So between these two events, I'm thinking the economy is going to have major kick in the ass..and stock prices are headed higher. More on that later.

3. Speaking of layoffs..I read that Mort Zuckerman was laying off hundreds of people, adding to the hundreds of thousands already out of job. Don't be a shmuck, Mort. Every other CEO is f--king up the process of layoffs--the way they're managing it is stupid. Yeah, we might have to layoff people on our trading desk too, but at least we're making sure we have a process in place. We brought in an expert--the guy's name is Murphy. I saw him on Fox News. His got a company called LeadershipIQ. Brilliant f--king guy. For anyone that needs to understand how most companies are cutting their own wrists when cutting staff, you need to sign up for Murphy's conference call. Its on Jan 20..No, he's not paying me a commish for introducing people, although he should! Click here for the details.

4. Last topic: I keep hearing about the people that are dumping their jewelry to raise cash at ridiculous prices. Stop it! I wrote about a guy named Stafford the other day. He sent me a message on his blackberry. He says that all of the yommy cap diamond dealers on 7th avenue are laughing hysterically about buying stuff at fifteen cents on the dollar. He's paying top dollar. Cash. Mark--if you don't like what Mom sent you, call that guy Stafford. I put a link on this page--its says My Favorite Diamond Dealer..that's a good way to get hold of him.

Full post as published by Bernard Madoff on January 09, 2009 (boomark / email).