Family Law

Retreat, Recover, Restart

By J. Benjamin Stevens

Over the fifteen years that I have been practicing family law, I have had the opportunity to observe a large number of people going through marital difficulties. Everyone reacts differently, as their situation and the challenges they face are unique.

A divorce is much like a death of someone close to you. If you think about it, it is the death of a very intimate relationship. Everyone grieves the loss of a loved one in different ways and at different speeds.  If you or someone you know is facing the breakup of a marriage, consider the following suggestions to help get through it:

• Retreat :: When you realize that your marriage is over, take some time for yourself to process what has happened and to plan for what will happen. Some people make the mistake of immediately trying to take steps in several different directions without any clear purpose. Until you know where you are going, you cannot even begin to determine how to best get there.
• Recover :: After accepting that your life has changed, you must then begin the recovery process. One of the key components of this phase is to consult with and hire the best attorney that you can afford. Having an experienced professional guide you through the legalities of separation and divorce can make your recovery much smoother by helping you protect the things most important to you (your children, your financial interests, etc.).
• Restart :: A divorce is not only an end, it is also a new beginning – the start of the next phase of your life. I have had many clients tell me as we walked out of the Courthouse from their divorce hearing that the sun seemed brighter, the air seemed fresher, etc. While that might be a slight overstatement, you shouldn't lose sight of the opportunities that are now available to you in the form of new relationships, possibly a new home, and the wisdom that you have gained from going through this process.

The main point of this article is to let you know that you will get through this and you may even come out a better person once you do. If my firm can assist you with your separation or divorce, please feel free to contact our office by clicking here.

Full post as published by SC Family Law Blog on September 20, 2010 (boomark / email).