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St. Patty's Day

By "Daisy Duke"

Yesterday was St. Patrick's Day. The Pope said so, and from what I hear, he has authority on those things. So yesterday BISMOW and I went from party to party and bar to bar and got our green on. It was great. Other than the unruly drunks, the vomit on the sidewalks and the other usual grossness of "Drinking Holidays". I'm sure you know what I speak of. We've all been there. I guess I was under the misconception that after college most of us grew out of that phase.

This upcoming week is Spring Break for the Law School. I'm pretty excited to pull my usual 8 hour work days without trying to fit classes & studying into them.

And now an excerpt from St. Patty's Day:

(Daisy is in a bar restroom, fixing her belt, etc. There appears to be something wrong with the toilet, i.e., it will not flush. Other people's business is hanging out. Icky.)

Girl Waiting In Line: Oh my Goodness. John is sooo out of control. (Continues blathering on, loudly, and bitching for quite some time. Loudly. Very. Very. Loudly.)

Daisy walks out of the bathroom.

Girl Waiting in In Line: Oh my God, you are such a gross bitch. Thanks for fucking flushing. Seriously. You are a waste of life.

Me, standing shocked staring at the door.

Other Girl Waiting In Line: (Laughing hysterically.) That was amazing. What an annoying brat. Oh wow. That was worth having to wait in line with her.

So I wash my hands, knock on her bathroom door and yell out in my thickest, politest Southern accent:

Thanks sweetheart. You have a great life now, you hear?

And then I ran out of there and told BISMOW we had to go somewhere else because a big angry girl was going to come kill me.

Full post as published by Legally Blonde Ambition on March 16, 2008 (boomark / email).