Family Law

Tips for Dealing with Divorce Related Depression

By J. Benjamin Stevens

While going through a divorce, it is natural to feel isolated, depressed and stressed out. Therese Borchard on Beliefnet offers several tips to lessen the effects of divorce related depression:

• Find a diversion and lose yourself in it. Whether it be reading, knitting, swimming or some other activity- keep your mind occupied and stop ruminating about your divorce.
• Get out of your routine. Put yourself in a situation, outside of your comfort zone, where you have to interact with people.
• Make plans. Put your self on a schedule and stick to it.
• Clean out and organize. Part with the needless 'stuff' that you accumulated during your marriage and serves as an anchor to your past married life.
• Preserve energy. Don't overload your schedule.
• Take the high road in your divorce. Avoid the need to get in the last word in. It is often better to be happy or at peace with your self, than to be right.
• Find a support network. Replace the support you sought from your spouse with friends, family or a support group with whom you can discuss your divorce related issues.
• Remember, you are not a failure.
• Share the wisdom and insights you gained from your divorce experience with others, but ignore unsolicited and uninformed advice.
• Don't rush the process. As with the death of a family member, you will experience, denial, anger, grief, and acceptance. Society has a mechanism for dealing with death (funerals, condolence calls, etc.) - there is no societal ritual for divorce.

The adage is time heals all wounds, but time spent alone will leave you spiteful, depressed and angry.

Source:  "Tips for Dealing with Divorce Related Depression" by Daniel Clement, published at his New York Divorce Report.

Full post as published by SC Family Law Blog on April 02, 2010 (boomark / email).