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Law Humor
: Lowering the BarWhy There's Nothing Special Here for April Fools' Day
By Kevin Underhill
I think the reason is because, in a sense, every day is April Fools' Day here. I mean, for example, did any of you really believe that any of these things actually happened?
- Two Gypsy clans go to court over who will control the Gypsy fortunetelling business in Newport Beach, California.
- Someone in Louisiana sues Wal-Mart claiming she was injured when Norman the Nutria scared her into running over her own foot with a shopping cart.
- A star prosecution witness reveals for the first time in his deposition that "alienlike creatures emerge from his closet and put pinholes into his chest and those of his family members." The DA stands by him, claiming to have video of what he calls a "phenomenon."
- A woman sues over defective clown shoes.
- An inmate sues prison officials after he is hurt during an escape attempt, charging them with negligence for not providing better security despite knowing of his "propensity to escape."
- A closing argument begins, "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'll kill all of you if you find me guilty."
- Lowering the Bar is cited as authority in a brief to the Supreme Court of the Philippines.
- There is a case entitled United States v. 50,000 Cardboard Boxes, More or Less, Each Containing One Pair of Clacker Balls.
- Tennessee authorities report that a former beauty queen who stalked, kidnapped and sexually assaulted a Mormon missionary, jumped bail by disguising herself as a member of a deaf-mute theater troupe, and then surfaced three decades later in South Korea surrounded by the world's first cloned pit-bull puppies, was also wanted in their state for conspiring to steal money she needed in order to buy an artificial limb for a three-legged horse.
Oh, wait -- those were all true.
Anyway, you see what I mean about April Fools' Day.
I will mention, though, that the Charlotte Observer coincidentally has a story today about the new fashion trend that has allegedly developed in opposition to "sagging," which I wrote about (again) just yesterday. Reportedly, the new trend, "hiking," takes pants in a new direction -- upward.
Personally, I think it's a tough call as to which fashion trend is worse for society. Hiking is possibly even more disturbing than sagging, but people with sagging pants tend to have more trouble fleeing from police.
Happy April 1st.
Link: Charlotte Observer
Full post as published by Lowering the Bar on April 01, 2010 (boomark / email).
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