Family Law

Let's face it, relationships are tough. There's nothing wrong with admitting that the hours spent at work can be a nice reprieve from your significant other.

So when the bedroom and the boardroom overlap, challenges arise that are unique to couples who work together. Take heart, there is a way to work together without filing for divorce. Couples who do it successfully say they respect each other's roles, communicate, and every now and then, say to their partners, "for goodness' sake, stop talking about the office."

Nonstop chatter about work is a mood killer. It's a common issue, so be aware of it and set limits. If you notice you haven't talked about anything with your spouse but the week's staff meeting, put a moratorium on it. Discuss the kids, your next vacation or even the weather. Just make sure to change the topic.

Another risk is the blending of home and work. "Business arguments can drift into your home and personal arguments can be continued at work," says Becky Stewart-Gross, who co-authored Sleeping with Your Business Partner with her husband, Mike Gross.

Keep conflict to a minimum by listening to your partner's feelings. Try to resolve issues with a "give and take" mentality. The idea is to find a win-win solution. Fights will likely be at a minimum if couples routinely "check in" with each other to assess their professional and personal relationships," says Stewart-Gross.

Along the same lines, make a weekly  "date night." Sometimes a different setting is just what a couple needs to recharge. Bruce and Marti Schoenberg, co-founders and co-owners of Oasis Day Spas in Manhattan, find that weekly dinner and movie dates are the antidote to the work "blahs."

"Work can consume you," says Marti Shoenberg, who is in charge of Oasis' décor, product line and its employees . "Make time for yourselves as a couple and as a family."

Oddly enough, the other trick is to  spend time apart. Alone time is important, and it's usually something we get when we're sitting at our desks, away from our families. Since that's not the case here, each person needs a hobby, a separate group of friends or some other outlet that takes them away from their significant other.

Sharon and Blake Rowe, co-founders of Eco-Bags Products in Ossining, N.Y., thrive together and separately. Sharon acts in and produces community theater, while Blake remains a professional piano player. Those outlets get their creative juices flowing and put them in touch with people outside their all-consuming business, which used to take over their entire apartment.

But the Rowes ran into another common issue. Although they founded the company together in the late '80s, Sharon ultimately took over as its president while Blake worked as its IT consultant in addition to being a full-time piano teacher. It's not easy taking orders from your significant other, he says. "Sharon needed to exercise some diplomacy about asking me to do things," says Blake Rowe. "I had to practice not being defensive if something I had done was not satisfactory to her."

Developing a proverbial "thick skin" helps. So does having  well-defined roles. Whether you work together in a corporation or in a small business, acknowledge your jobs and their responsibilities. Yes, it's tough to take direction from your husband or wife, but if that's what the job description is, don't take it personally. And don't expect special treatment--keep things professional.

Having said that, don't have unrealistic expectations from your significant other. Set goals and the deadlines like any other manager-employee relationship. If a project failed, analyze why. "Nobody is going to hit it right every time--it's not possible," says Bruce Shoenberg. "You have to live with each other's decisions. Support each other. Marti knows she can always count on me for support."

And remember that  the marriage comes first. As Bruce Schoenberg puts it, "My marriage is the most important thing to me. I was looking for my wife my whole life. I can always find another business."

Read more about this in Forbes.