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Law Humor

: Bernard Madoff

Bernie Brainstorming

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While all of the smarty pants talking heads are busy betting on what's going to happen next week in court, Jeff Katzenberg is busy negotiating the rights for Madoff Mania Productions' 1st TV show; its going to be bigger than "Dallas" and "Dynasty", and I'm thinking its going to make 10x more money than the two of those shows combined, what with the syndication rights we're already selling.

We've got more colorful characters than a box of crayola crayons--and Peter can tell you that we'll be able to write in more sexy scenes than anything else that's ever been on the major networks. Money, sex, intrigue, and lifestyles of the used-to-be-rich and still-are-rich, all blended into maybe four years worth of weekly, 1 hour episodes.

As always, this idea was all mine, and nobody, including Frank Avellino or Frankie D. is responsible for this one . But many thanks to Jodi for printing up the elements and sending them out, and thanks as always to Shana and Marcia C. for making sure all of the copyrights are in compliance. And don't worry, girls, your bonus money for this project was included with the '08 year-end payments for BMIS employees that Irving paid out from the bankruptcy trust!

No thanks needed to my two sons; Andy was too busy slapping around the messengers, and Mark was busy whining about who knows what.

So, anyway, while Ruth and I are out here at the place in Montauk enjoying the warm weather today (and of course, visiting with Ira so that Joyce doesn't get any shit for making an exception to my travel terms), I'm thinking we should call the show "Lipstick", or "64 East", or maybe "MadeAway". Ruth loved that show Dynasty, so she's thinking we should call it "Midasty" (after me, Madoff the Midas), but I don't know if that idea works.

I don't usually give a shit about other people's opinions, but in this case, if you've got a comment, feel free to submit it, or send me a note using Ask Me A Question.

And, Janey Wells--before you call up and say "Bernie, baby!...You've got to do a reality show!" that's already in the works too, trust me. That's the first thing we thought of after the security company installed all of those f--king video cameras in December--so then we bought an extra two cases for Mark's place in Nantucket and Andy's place in the city!

So, Janey, trust me when I tell you that this is going to be the Reality TV show; split screens with out takes from Mark's house, Andy's place, and our co-op!!

If your boss Immelt has half a brain, he'd be calling before the world starts turning next week, so that he could get the rights to the show. But, after the shellacking GE's stock got last week, I can tell you honestly that I'm not so sure that NBC is going to be the network we want to go with. Besides, I'm thinking we want to be competing directly against Trump's stupid show--just to kick his ass. Or in Andy's words, to "slap him around some."

Money talks, Janey...so tell your boss that you're the enabler for this deal--and if Immelt wants to do something to make his stock price go up, he'll want to do a deal with us pronto. But, he'll have to go through you. As always--we'll run the commish through Cohmad. Talk to Sonny about that.

And Janey-you know that we have friends over at CBS courtesy of Stan Bing--so this isn't something that your people will want to sit on for more than a day.

BTW-- Everyone always wants to know where Ruth and I are having dinner next--tonight its Nick & Toni's in Easthampton. Just the two of us.

BLM

Full post as published by Bernard Madoff on March 07, 2009 (boomark / email).