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For the past two years of law school, I've really felt all along that I just don't know enough. I don't feel that in any of my classes, even the ones I got good grades in, that I fully grasped all of the concepts of that area of law. Some of them, I'm pretty sure I didn't grasp a single concept of the law (i.e. Tax). But my work as a clerk has certainly improved my research skills, and my analytical skills. I want to take another legal research class next year, because I still feel like I take too long with research. I want to be really thorough and make sure I don't miss anything, but also I'm heavily dependent upon Westlaw, and if I work for a firm that doesn't have an account, or a full access account, I might run into some problems.

I've begun to realize that practically no one knows all the concepts of law anyway. That both reassures me and scares me. A friend who's been practicing for about five years now just started her own firm. We were discussing my fight with Evil Health Insurance Company, and she made a statement about an element of damages in insurance law that was wrong. She'd practiced insurance defense for four years. On one hand, I felt reassured knowing that no one knows everything about their area of law. On the hand, I always believed that after law school and a few years of practice, I would really know my shit. Maybe I won't. And I'm afraid of screwing something up, with no one around to check my work, to make sure I don't.

Those of you who practice solo, did that scare you at first? Does that still scare you? As I'm approaching my final year of law school, and will be expected to take the bar and practice law, I'm starting to wonder when I'll feel like a "real attorney." And I hope I'll be a good one.

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