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How to Divorce like an Adult and Successfully Co-Parent

By James Chau

A very helpful article I read regarding how you the litigant has more power than you think during your divorce.  In fact the article mentions that you can control the outcome of your divorce if you put into action some helpful tips.   I have highlighted the important tips from the article.   The article is here.

1.  Number one in any Santa Clara County, San Jose Divorce situation is to always tell your spouse face to face that you are contemplating a divorce.  The article states that you should hopefully sooner than later tell your spouse the internal dialogue in your head regarding your thoughts on actualizing a divorce.  The article recommends dealing with the difficult conversations in multiple steps rather than finalizing everything at once with divorce papers.

2.  If your spouse wants to attempt therapy, you should go according to the article.  The article mentions that couples therapy or marital counseling should always be contemplated before any divorce filing.  Assuming there is no abuse mental or physical, it is a good idea to investigate whether the marriage can be saved.  In fact in California before the granting of the no fault divorce, California courts will ask a litigant whether there is anything that can be done to save the marriage that might include marital counseling before the granting of the dissolution of marriage.

3.  Never bad mouth your ex around your kids.  The article states that it doesn't matter who is the cheater or who decided to end the marriage.  Taking your frustrations out by way of the kids is always the wrong decision.  The article states that kids are hurt and feel guilty when the parent that they love is being hurt by the other parent that they love.  It puts the children in a tug of war spot that can have lasting negative affects on children.  Put downs are never part of a successful co-parenting.

4.  Remember the children are the ones who ultimately suffer.  The article states that during high conflict divorces the children are the ones who will ultimately suffer.  The children tend to mimic the behavior of their parents and will take on histrionic behaviors when the parents have normalized fighting and arguments.

If there are any legal questions you may have, I encourage you to, please contact my San Jose Divorce Lawyers office. My San Jose Family Lawyer offices assists many people who are going through family law related issues. We have many Affordable San Jose Divorce Lawyer solutions for many different budgets. We help many individuals through this very chaotic period in their life. Proudly serving the following cities, Fremont, Milpitas, Los Gatos, Cupertino, Mountain View, and Santa Clara.

Full post as published by San Jose Divorce Law and Family Law Lawyer Blog on March 18, 2016 (boomark / email).