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Miscellaneous

: Minor Wisdom

Ironically, the pastor?s name is ?Lamb?

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It seems somebody stole a trailer belonging to the Revolution Church in Canton, Georgia and full of stuff the church needs every Sunday. So the pastor, with the love of Christ in his heart, wrote this open letter to the thieves:

To the people who stole our trailer:

First let me say, God loves you. Second let me say we forgive you. We really don?t want to forgive you, but God says we should so we do. Third of all I want you to know that I think you are scum bags. I think you are lowlife degenerates who need a good butt kicking. Matter of fact I feel so strongly about the fact that you need a good butt kicking that I am volunteering to do it. I hope you believe in God because you should get on your knees and cry out to Him like never before because if we find you, I can promise we will kick the crap out of you. It won?t be pretty, it won?t be over quickly, and it will be very painful. I know that doesn?t sound very nice but I feel pretty strongly that is what you need.

I am curious what kind of lowlife you must be? Trust me, I have been around some pretty low ones before but never one that would be so low as to steal from a church. I understand you probably need some crack or something like that but stealing from a church would scare me. It would scare me more once I realized which church I stole it from. We are probably the only church you have ever heard of that will honestly break your legs once you are found.

Let me say again that we DO forgive you. But there are still consequences for your sin and your consequence will be toting a butt kicking. It is obvious you aren?t very smart so let me give you some advice. Get that trailer out of the county QUICK. As soon as I hit publish on this blog post a church of about 1000 crazy people will know that our black, children?s trailer has been stolen and I can promise they will be on the lookout for it. You would much rather me find you then one of them. :)

Best Wishes,

Gary Lamb

Lead Pastor, Revolution Church

Hat tip to Law Religion Culture Review.

Full post as published by Minor Wisdom on July 06, 2008 (boomark / email).

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