Legal Commentary

And The Really Weird Thing: They Were All First Cousins

By Kevin Funnell

MEMPHIS, Tenn. (AP) - Defense attorney Leslie Ballin called it the "jury pool from hell."

The group of prospective jurors was summoned to listen to a case of Tennessee trailer park violence.

Right after jury selection began last week, one man got up and left, announcing, "I'm on morphine and I'm higher than a kite."

When the prosecutor asked if anyone had been convicted of a crime, a prospective juror said that he had been arrested and taken to a mental hospital after he almost shot his nephew. He said he was provoked because his nephew just would not come out from under the bed.

Another would-be juror said he had had alcohol problems and was arrested for soliciting sex from an undercover officer. "I should have known something was up," he said. "She had all her teeth."

Another prospect volunteered he probably should not be on the jury: "In my neighborhood, everyone knows that if you get Mr. Ballin (as your lawyer), you're probably guilty." He was not chosen.

The case involved a woman accused of hitting her brother's girlfriend in the face with a brick. Ballin's client was found not guilty.

Who says Tennessee ain't a fun State?

I was walkin' in Memphis.
I was walkin' with my feet ten feet off of Beale.
I was walkin' in Memphis.
But do I really feel the way I feel?

"She's my sister." (SLAP)
"She's my daughter." (SLAP)
"She's my sister(SLAP); She's my daughter(SLAP); She's my sister AND my daughter. Get it?"
"Forget it, Jake, it's Memphis."

Full post as published by Counseling Kevin on September 30, 2010 (boomark / email).