Academic

Appreciating the Prose of Ted Nugent

By Kathy Stanchi

Yes, you read that right. As a student (and teacher) of writing, I'm always on the lookout for prose that really gets you. Clear, clean, direct prose that is both simple but also profound, or funny, or even both. I recently came across an example of this kind of writing (ok it was mostly funny and less profound, but even so), courtesy of the NYT Book Review.

Many of you (ok, a small minority of you) might remember Ted Nugent, or "the Nuge" as my friend Dan Filler calls him, as the man who brought the world the 1970s hair metal hit, Cat Scratch Fever.  Never really an A-list metal rocker, and trust me, I know about this, the Nuge has nevertheless reinvented himself. He's become something of a right wing darling (I always knew there was a right wing/metal connection) and uber-patriot (his new book, Ted, White and Blue is No. 8 on the NYT non-fiction list).  I can only imagine that a campaign run is on the way.

This is writing that caught my eye. It is the Nuge's take on free-range chicken, from his prior book "Kill It and Grill It":

?Free-range chicken ain?t free and that ain?t no range. Venison is free-range. Pheasant is free-range. The almighty Ruffed Grouse is free-range. I?m free-range. Chickens are incarcerated. . . . If it can?t get away, it ain?t free-range and I ain?t interested.?

That, people, is a damn fine comic rant.  From the use of classical rhetoric (yup, antistrophe) to the amazing imagery (the "almighty" Ruffled Grouse? why is the grouse singled out for this elevated adjective? the "incarcerated" chickens? are the chickens doing hard time? are they in a "correctional facility"?), to the self-reference (Made me wonder, am I free range? I do spend a lot of time in my office).  And, you have to admit, he has a point.  Say it out loud; it's even better.

The next time someone asks me (I'm a vegetarian) whether I will eat chicken if it is "free range," I know what my answer's going to be.

And, by the way, for those city folk, this is the almighty ruffled grouse, in all his glory.

Full post as published by The Faculty Lounge on October 31, 2008 (boomark / email).