Paralegals & Legal Secretaries

1. You must not be a lunatic.


2. You must actually know what is going on in your own cases.


3. You must not continually screw up your own cases, and then expect me to magically fix the problems or blame me when things go wrong as a result of your errors.


4. You must be willing to pay me on a regular basis for my services (just a reminder). I do not accept food, liquor or drugs as payment. Payment must be made in valid, U.S. currency and must be a reasonable wage for a person of my skill set.


5. You must possess basic social skills.

I'm actually okay with my boss being "disastrously disorganized" because that just makes me more indispensable. (But in my reality, my boss has the cleanest desk in the office.)

The Craigslist poster says the ad is "most certainly not" a joke. (If it is a joke, it's a pretty good one.)

As a former co-worker used to say to certain intake callers with unreasonable expectations of any law firm's ability to undo a seriously hot mess (usually involving alcohol, homemade tranquilizers, or rude hand gestures at a former place of employment), "Good luck with that."

Ya'll got anything to add to the list? What do ya think - will this novel approach lead to a request for an interview by "Boss McDreamy"?

Sources: Above the Law; Craigslist