International Law

Americans Think Confucius Was A Communist

By Stan

At first glance, after reading this story in Xinhua, I thought this was a joke. While I firmly believe that my own study of the Chinese language will eventually lead to premature sinility and/or a variety of nervous disorders, I never suspected it could be this insidious. Then I found confirmation of the conspiracy in a local newspaper in Southern California.

If nothing else, this is very strong anecdotal evidence that attempts to facilitate cultural awareness between China and other countries, while noble and sorely needed, will not always be successful. The reason? Unfortunately, some people are, at their core, completely bugfuck nuts and in need of medical attention. Even heroic attempts to facilitate greater China-foreign understanding, like the unprecedented multicultural communications forum called china/divide wouldn’t be able to reach these people.

This story is too priceless to let it go without the proper setup. So here’s how it all started:

On Jan. 28, the district’s school board voted 4-1 to approve an agreement implementing the Confucius Classroom at Cedarlane Middle School.

According to the agreement, Hanban will provide instructors, books, multimedia materials and money for the program. It states that the goal of the program is to “strengthen educational cooperation between China and the Unified States,” as well as facilitate mutual understanding between the youth of the United States and China and promote Chinese language education.

Hanban is the nickname for the The Chinese Language Council International, a government-sponsored group that puts together and funds Chinese-language and culture programs at educational institutions all over the world. Kind of a wonderful thing, isn’t it? Not so often that I can say unequivocally that this is a win-win for everyone involved, and whoever created this should be heartily congratulated. It would be impossible to find anyone who thinks this is a bad idea, right?

Think again. Some knuckle-draggers in Southern California set out to prove that humans with IQs of less than 25 can actually function in modern society.

Parents and community members who are upset by a Chinese language and culture classroom slated to open at Cedarlane Middle School next year say they’re planning to voice concerns at Thursday night’s Hacienda La Puente Unified School District board meeting.

They allege that the Confucius Classroom, which is sponsored by the Chinese Language Council International, will become a vessel for political propaganda.

“We are going to war on communism,” said Teresa Macias, a Hacienda Heights resident whose two children graduated from Los Altos High School.

I honestly don’t know whether to laugh, crap my pants, or hide under my desk.

No matter that the program in question has nothing to do with ideology of any kind. If China is involved, there must be brainwashing going on. The most startling, shocking aspect of this whole tawdry episode, though, is that this woman, this tireless champion in the struggle against Communism, actually has two children that graduated from high school. I guess there’s hope for everyone.

Well, perhaps I’m being too tough on Mrs. Macias. She is apparently some sort of investigative journalist whiz kid who cleverly connected the dots between Hanban and the CCP:

Macias said she plans to present the board with photos that tie the Chinese Language Council International, also known as Hanban, with the Chinese Communist Party.

“American people are going to be outraged when they learn the truth,” Macias said. ” … We won’t tolerate it. We have got to stand up and fight for our American soil.”

I think Obama should call in the Chinese Ambassador to explain this. How dare them Chinese folks try to take away American soil! Must be mighty fertile stuff to risk an international incident.

But seriously, Mrs. Macias must have done some research. She was obviously poised to break the news, supported by documentary evidence, that Hanban is a tool of the CCP. Congrats to her effort and energy.

On the other hand, she might have saved some time by visiting Hanban’s web site and doing a bit of cutting and pasting from the “About Us” page:

The Chinese Language Council International is composed of members from 12 state ministries and commissions, namely, the General Office of the State Council, the Ministry of Education, the Ministry of Finance, the Overseas Chinese Affaires Office of the State Council, the Ministry of Foreign Affairs . . .

I would just like to point out for the record that it does not appear that Hanban is doing much to hide its affiliation with the Chinese government. That doesn’t mean the consiracy theory is unfounded, of course. It always pays to be insanely paranoid, ’cause you’ll never be surprised when the guys in the black helicopters come looking for you.

© Stan for China Hearsay, 2010. | Permalink | 9 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: bigotry, china communist party, chinese language, communism, confucius, education, hanban

Full post as published by China Hearsay on March 01, 2010 (boomark / email).