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: Nuts & Boalts

Lawyering Like the Fonz

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During my first full week of law school, I received many pearls of wisdom from my peers and the administration ? some solicited, others not so much (I?m looking at you, 3L who told me to rename my book budget ?Beer Budget.?) The one tip that struck me as most poignant: Take LRW and WOA seriously, they are the only thing standing between you and imminent doom this summer. Understood. In fact ? I can?t wait to learn lawerly skills. Lawyers have rock-star status in my mind right now.

You can imagine I was excited, then, when my new-ish phone unexpectedly snapped in two over the weekend (yes, they still sell flip-phones new.) I thought to myself: I shall march into the AT&T store down on Shattuck and use a lawyerly death-stare to intimidate the sales clerk into giving me a replacement! Such interactions are sure to build my lawyer street-cred:

Me: Hello there. Let me show you something? [scatters dead phone parts on table]. I bought this phone from THIS VERY store less than a year ago. Humph. [death-stare]
Elderly Store Employee: And that is my fault? how?
[Staring Contest for the Ages ensues]
Me: Uh? erm? you know what? I must have put it in my back pocket a few too many times. And sat on it. My bad. Can I maybe? give you a couple hundred dollars for a new one??
Elderly Store Employee: Fine ? but I?m just warning you now, we?re understocked. I have a lot of phones in neon green.
Me: Oh, well that?s perfect. Neon green? Who doesn?t love that.

Epilogue: I now own a neon green phone. In other words? EPIC FAIL. I thought that starting law school would imbue me with that magical intimidating quality most lawyers have, but (sigh) I suppose these things come with time. That said, I don?t think the administration should rule out adding another first-year seminar: Lawyering Like the Fonz, 101. Now those are skills I can USE.

Full post as published by Nuts & Boalts on August 25, 2009 (boomark / email).