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Miscellaneous

: Jeremy Blachman's Brand New Weblog

The Best They Can Do?

By jeremyblachman

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OK, The New York Times has an op-ed by Roger Cohen rewriting Billy Joel's We Didn't Start The Fire for the current generation and Obama's election.  Honestly, I think it's pretty crappy.  A lot of the rhymes don't rhyme (American Beauty / Oprah Winfrey ??  Paris Hilton / Bin Laden ??) and the syllable emphasis is really off in so many places.  Plus the original was actually chronological and this is all muddled together in no discernable sequence (Bill Clinton / Tina Fey ??) If the Times is going to bother publishing something like this, shouldn't it at least be well-crafted and carefully done? 

...the (completely justified) comment to this post should be, "if you're going to criticize, at least prove that you can do it better."  OK, I will.  Here goes:

(1994) 
Tonya Harding, Northridge Quake, Menendez brothers' big mistake
Lorena Bobbitt, Schindler's List, NAFTA in effect

(1995)
Ripken's streak, Sarin gas, OJ Simpson gets a pass
Oklahoma City bombing, Kobe Japan wrecked

(1996)
Jon Benet, Deep Blue, Clinton gets term number two
Bulls win, sheep clone, Unabomber's cover blown

(1997)
Promise Keepers, Princess Di, Hale-Bopp passes through the sky
Blair elected, Heaven's Gate, market's dropping like a stone

[Chorus]

(1998)
Monica Lewinsky, "vast right-wing conspiracy"
Antitrust, George Michael bust, Google is born

(1999)
Napster, The Euro, Hugo Chavez, Kosovo
JFK plane crash, Columbine we mourn

(2000)
Elian, Y2K, Gore wins, Bush wins, who can say
Civil unions, Peanuts ends, Bush and Putin become friends

(2001)
Stem cells, Enron, in an instant Towers gone
air attacks, anthrax, Taliban, Bin Laden

[Chorus]

(2002)
Daniel Pearl, Afghanistan, and the Iraq War began
Milosevic is in a bind, No Child Left Behind

(2003)
Martha Stewart, Phnom Penh, Concorde never flies again
Schwarzenegger, SARS fear, Ferry crash into a pier

(2004)
Abu Ghraib, Reagan dies, Jim McGreevey's quick demise
Big tsunami, Red Sox win, Bush elected once again

(2005)
YouTube, new Pope, New Orleans is forced to cope
Hurricane, London bomb, start the trial of Saddam

[Chorus]

(2006)
Bird Flu, Java quake, gels on airplanes you can't take
(2007)
Writers' strike, Bhutto, wildfires grow and grow

(2008)
Gas price soars, Michael Phelps, markets plunge and nothing helps
Election Day, and now we say, Obama gives his speech today...

[Chorus]

----

You be the judge: me, or the Times?  ;)

Full post as published by Jeremy Blachman's Brand New Weblog on January 20, 2009 (boomark / email).

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