Legal News

Lyondell?s Lawyers of the Conference Room Round Table

By Peter Lattman

We know M&A lawyers receive lucite tombstones for getting big deals done. But what do litigators get from their clients when they win lawsuits? At Lyondell Chemical, they get four-foot-long swords!

That’s right, according to this Corporate Counsel story, Lyondell recently convened 90 lawyers at a Houston Four Seasons to induct 17 of their outside attorneys into the “Knights of the Lyondell Enterprise.” They joined this decade-old “order” that recognizes lawyers who help the company win a major litigation.

The sword each received is described as a “unsharpened, but still looking like it could inflict serious damage.” Repeat winners are given a bronze statue of a knight on horseback. Associate GC Joseph Speelman also hams it up. For instance, he reportedly called up Michael Nilan and Scott Smith of Minneapolis’s Halleland Lewis Nilan & Johnson, proclaiming that the two had “sojourned across the land . . . guarding against marauding hordes.” But then, “Lo! A summons was issued from the faraway country of Wisconsin, where the Enterprise was attacked yet again by its lead paint adversaries.” (Lyondell was sued by a Wisconsin resident over alleged injuries from lead paint that was allegedly manufactured by a Lyondell subsidiary.)

Then Speelman described the November trial: “And in the late hour of the last week, the swords of the Enterprise Knights did break the blades of the enemy into shards. And in that moment, the clouds parted and a silver finger of Divine light shone forth.” Speelman raised his hand and led the room in unison: “Victory was ours!”

Speelman says the awards foster a loyalty; lawyers told Corporate Counsel the swords make them feel valued. Thomas Hagemann of Gardere Wynne Sewell told CC that the medieval theme was fitting since trial lawyers “do share a love of jousting.”

It wasn’t clear how the lawyers were going to get their swords home.

Full post as published by Law Blog - WSJ.com on January 28, 2008 (boomark / email).