International Law

A rant and rave

By John Hirst

Last night, or to be exact 5 minutes into this morning, I started to watch Nightwatch - Emergency on ITV, which I had seen advertised on Teletext, and it was confirmed what I was watching when the title came up. Therefore, what was the point of having the spare prick at a wedding? Namely, "Hi. I'm Steve Scott. Your watching Nightwatch". Am I really? Well, I never! He droned on "And coming up on this week's programme...". Doesn't ITV think I can find out by myself what's coming up by my watching the programme without the need for this fucking idiot getting paid for stating the obvious? I know that it has been said that people's attention span is only 8 minutes, nevetherless, after 15 minutes the irritating sod is back telling me what I have just been watching for the last 15 minutes, recapping, and what's coming up after the break and to stay tuned in. There was just 1 advert advertising an ITV programme and then it was de ja vue, or Groundhog Day, "Hi. I'm Steve Scott" he then recaps again what I had been watching in the first 15 minutes, in case I had forgotten this and his recap during the 1 minute interval, and tells me again what is coming up in part 2. Grrrrhhh!

Half of the programme featured the coming and goings of an A&E department in a Birmingham hospital and my mind wandered to Mousie and my admiration for her and the work that she does in the front line. I already knew that the human bite is worse than a dog's (Park Rangers take note) but I learned that even a cat's bite is worse than a dog's. Rocky only picks up 3rd prize! One chap (not bitten) lost the tip of his thumb and surgeons spent 14 hours grafting it back on, only for him to go back into the operating theatre the next day to have it removed again, and a bit more besides, because it had not worked out, and to stop infection.

The other half of the programme featured a Fire and Rescue department in Bristol Temple Meads. I was interested to learn that when firemen start the job they are put on probation for 2 years. I think that the Criminal Justice System is in need of reform because usually one has to commit a criminal offence to be put on 2 years probation! Who the fuck gave planning permission for high rise blocks of flats when even the extendible ladder failed to reach the 12th floor let alone the 15th floor? And of course, the lift was out of action! I shared the frustration and annoyance expressed by the firemen at the 10 call outs per night to car fires started by car thieves to destroy evidence; and the 6 call outs every night to students halls of residence, when 4 tenders have to attend, because the bloody idiots set off the fire alarms as a prank. Why doesn't the Dean of the university get a grip of this madness?

"I'm Steve Scott. You have been watching...". I would dearly like to see a remake of The Wickerman, this time starring Steve Scott, and for something seriously to go wrong with the pyrotechnics, and all the Fire and Rescue engines to be out on call tending car fires and student halls of residence. Sorry, Steve, burn in hell! Alternatively, get a real job!

Full post as published by prisonlawinsideout on January 18, 2008 (boomark / email).