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I've Looked Forward to This for 3 Years

By Anonymous

Tomorrow morning we fly to Chicago for my graduation. I am really not looking forward to the traveling as it is going to screw up Landon's tenuous nap schedule and he is NOT going to appreciate the restrictions that will be placed on his crawling and cruising. I am however greatly looking forward to seeing my beautiful city, a bunch of my family, my wonderful friends, and even the ugly law school building. In two weeks I've already become a bit nostalgic for the place, although that could just be because the Bar is starting to scare me. The law school won't let you fail an exam, but I'm pretty sure the Texas Board of Law Examiners has no problem doing so.

I've been in a quandary about the dress I will wear on Friday and have settled on a beautiful black and red one from my mother's closet. It finally hit home how thin I've gotten when I secretly tried on her dress, expecting it to get stuck halfway up, and was amazed to find that it fit perfectly. We also went shopping while I was home and found a very fitted and fun red dress that I think I'm going to change into for dinner. The ruffly pink dress is now too loose so I'm saving it for a fancy summer outing when I gain some weight back. We're only going to be gone for 48 hours and we're not checking any luggage, but I will have three pairs of shoes with me on the plane. And they're all black. But the style and shade of blackness must be coordinated with each outfit. I'm sure you all understand, though my husband is shaking his head at me and the tiny suitcase we're "sharing". He may have to wear his graduation suit on the plane.

I haven't decided if I'm taking my laptop. I'd like to because I really have a hard time being separated from it for more than 24 hours and there are some pictures of Landon I know my in-laws would love to see (they are not techno savvy and do not go on our pictures website or have any idea this blog exists), but I'm not sure there will be room in our carry ons. I always imagined I'd have a grand post for the day I graduated. I started writing it in my head halfway through 1L, before I even had a blog. I've always composed journal-like entries in my head, I just never wrote them down until I discovered blogger. I actually used to get teary eyed thinking about it because I was so miserable and depressed that year. I still get teary eyed, but for different reasons.

I have many thoughts on graduation, only a few of which are fully formed in my mind, and the special entry I'd planned will probably appear after the bar exam when I have time to think instead of memorize. I'm excited, sad, relieved, hopeful, nervous, and so many more things about the end of my career as a student and the start of my career as a lawyer. Right now I'm mostly proud. To say it's been a difficult year would be a vast understatement, but it's over and we more than survived. Our marriage is happy and stronger than ever. My nearly 11-month-old son is a bundle of giggles and merriment and is very much his own little person. After patiently waiting his turn at grad school, JP will be pursuing his dreams in the Fall. And there's me, somewhat overwhelmed and very excited about what's ahead. I'm twenty-five years old, a wife, mom, home owner, former honors student and national merit scholar, former nationally ranked swimmer, new law school graduate without any honors or asterisks by my name at all, and hopeful member of the Texas Bar. I also own a lot of shoes and love school supplies.

So like I said, I have thoughts on all this, very few of which are coherent. But right I'm overflowing with feelings of pride and relief which are combining into a watery substance leaking from my eyes. Man, if I'm tearing up now I'm going to be a mess on Friday.

Full post as published by Lag Liv on June 12, 2008 (boomark / email).