Family Law

Importance of Documenting the Details

By Ben Stevens

In Family Court cases, one cannot overstate the importance of being able to prove your allegations.  Many of these cases are "he said / she said", so having the ability to give specific detail is particularly important.  In contested cases, I encourage my clients to keep journals for me so that we can later document specific dates and times that important events occurred.

Chris Schmiedeke of the Texas Family Law Blog blogged on this subject, and he agrees that journaling is important.  He points out that the problem with most stories and allegations in custody and visitation modification cases is that they are coming from memory. This creates two problems, one they cannot recall the story exactly, or most importantly they cannot put a date on it. This creates unreliability in the evidence. It also creates a he said, she said scenario.

Client: "My ex never exercises his visitation and when he does, he is always late."

Lawyer: (Drooling at the excellent information he is about to get) "Can you get me a list of all those dates he missed and the dates and times of when he was late?"

Client: "Well, I do not remember all the dates, but it is pretty much a couple times a month."

Lawyer: (Rolls his eyes and sighs) "Okay well try to put something together."

The way to combat this is to keep a journal of everything involved in your case or your child's life.  If the parent is always late to pick up the child, document it. If the parent is constantly missing visitations, document it. If your ex says something particularly nasty on the phone in front of the child, document it.

It doesn't have to be anything elaborate, just a simple calendar to refresh your memory down the road. Imagine you get in a courtroom and you are alleging that the other parent is constantly missing visitations. The other parent says that is not true, but does not really seem to have anything to back up their denial. On the other hand, you have your journal and know the exact dates, times and what was said for each missed visitation and can list them out for the judge in detail. Who do you think the judge will believe?

A simple little task, kept up with over time, can have such a HUGE impact on your case.  Remember not to be TOO detailed, as this is not a diary.  Remember that you could be required to give the other side a copy of your journal if you use it at a hearing. If you know that the other side could be reading it, that will help you keep it simple.

Source:  "Journaling in Texas Divorce and Modification Cases" by Chris Schmiedeke, published at his Texas Family Law Blog.

Full post as published by SC Family Law Blog on June 11, 2008 (boomark / email).