Law Students

stirring up trouble until the very end

Posted on May 14, 2008
So, in just about every open-book exam I've taken in law school, I've taken along my iPod...mostly because no professor has ever explicitly said, "You can't use that."   So I happily bring along my iPod so that I can rock out to Appetite for Destruction during the exam...

and the award for "best use of a pass/fail" goes to...

Posted on May 05, 2008
I just referenced both the Village People and strippers in an exam.I'm fairly certain that this is an unparalleled level of awesomeness.......I suppose it's good to leave law school on a high note. 

apocalypse (s)now

Posted on April 28, 2008
It is snowing in Madison today.  For those of you who didn't do a double-take and then check the calendar on your computers, today is April 28th.  Otherwise known as three-days-before-the-start-of-May.  So not only is it spring, it's venturing into "late spring" territory...

we're not lovers, we're lawyers

Posted on April 23, 2008
Today, some group in the law school planned to have a sex toy party at the school. Since just about every event that has been planned at the Law School this year has been cancelled or forced to move, they sought the administration's permission to host the free event in the law school building...

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the lunch nazi

Posted on April 22, 2008
So one of my friends and I were sitting in the atrium at school from about 11-1 earlier today.  She remarked that, she brought lunch, but wasn't hungry.  So she decided to heat up her lunch at about 1:15 and take it to class with her.As a much more considerate person that I could ever be, she asked her fellow students if eating her hot tasty lunch in class would be a problem...

dangerous mind's day off

Posted on April 16, 2008
To celebrate one of the first nice days of spring (and the fact that Family Law class was cancelled), I skipped town (and Contracts II) yesterday and drove down to Chicago.   So I strolled through the Art Institute for a few hours, enjoyed a walk down the Magnificent Mile, and capped off my day with a night game at Wrigley:The Cubs won in magnificent fashion (thanks to the wind blowing out to left...

naked pictures of supreme court justices

Posted on April 14, 2008
I was leaving First Amendment today, blissfully confused by everything that had been said during the previous hour and a half, when I overheard the following in the stairwell:"You know Supreme Court Justice Blackmun?  Yeah, I had a dream that I was totally hanging out with him...

if only i knew how to take an exam

Posted on April 10, 2008
Yeah, so all that flipping out about Contracts the other day was for nothing.  I got my response e-mail from the professor, who said that it was clear that I understand what's going on in class.  That is the first time the word "understand" has been used to refer to me and my performance in a law school class in almost three years...

more fun with contracts

Posted on April 08, 2008
I'm on call in Contracts today, and actually nervous about it.Not because I just started doing the reading for this semester 10 days ago....  Well, maybe that's part of it.  But I've done all but three weeks' worth of reading at this point, and I think I have a decent grasp on what's going on...

what if barbie had a hand grenade?

Posted on March 25, 2008
Some days, I wonder why I even bother going to Contracts II.One of the 1L sheep just asked a question about a case that began, "What if America had a caste system?" Then, he wanted to know how the contract in question would function under such a system...

passive-agressive professors, and the students that love them

Posted on March 25, 2008
At the beginning of the semester, my Contracts II professor (I know, I know...) told the class that there would be no seating chart, and she wanted the students to make nametags for their seats. As in, the students were responsible for finding their own piece of paper and their own marker to make a sign legible enough for her to read from twenty feet away...

that'll do, weather

Posted on March 21, 2008
Apparently, Madison is in the middle of a massive snowstorm right now that will leave roughly a foot of freshly-fallen snow on the city by tomorrow.Yes, it is March 21. I know; I double-checked.Fortunately, I'm in Mesa, it's 77 degrees out at 10am, and I won't have to deal with snow when I go to the Brewers spring training game this afternoon...

spring break approacheth

Posted on March 10, 2008
I have a paper due at the end of March (i.e., the Friday after I return from spring break).Said paper is for my Islamic Law class.If I take my giant Islamic Law binder with me to Arizona (most likely in the checked luggage), what are the odds that I get questioned by the TSA after they search my luggage? (Of course, I could just avoid all of this altogether by not taking the homework with me in the first place...

the greatest compliment ever

Posted on March 06, 2008
My sister just called me - from Arizona - because she locked herself out of the Athletic Training office at the high school where she works.Her reason?"The first person I think of when I need to know how to break into things...is you." ......this is why it's a good thing that relatives can't act as character references for the character and fitness portion of the bar application...

have you accepted brett favre as your personal lord and savior?

Posted on March 05, 2008
I'm almost surprised that the Wisconsin state flag was not flying at half-staff today to mourn the end of the career of Football Jesus. I have even heard reports of several Favre jerseys being sighted around the law school today, although I only managed to see one...

flavor of disease

Posted on March 04, 2008
So I was watching Flavor of Love 3 earlier today...A couple of the girls went to Flav because they were concerned about this spot on this one cast member's (Hotlanta, I believe) mouth. So Hotlanta goes to Flav to explain that she does not have herpes...

do you accept this declaration of shenanigans?

Posted on February 25, 2008
Two posts in one day - can you believe it?So this morning, I opened up iTunes to purchase that song from "Once" that won the Best Original Song Oscar last night. I get to the soundtrack's page and discover that the song I'm looking for (and, incidentally, every song on the album) is only available if you purchase the entire album...

i learn something new every day

Posted on February 25, 2008
Now this is how I should have been approaching my last semester in law school... Me (upon seeing a friend of mine leaving the building before First Amendment): What is this, three in a row?Him: Hey, I went last Wednesday. Once a week is enough.Me: Probably...

reading over shoulders is a valuable skill

Posted on February 24, 2008
My Contracts II class is about 85% 1Ls. It's even more torturous than it sounds.Last week, our professor went on a rant about how most contracts are poorly drafted and that law schools do little to remedy that problem. So I look up from my game of Tetris 2 for a few minutes and see that the kid in front of me has written the following in his notes:"Law school does not spend lot of time talking and teaching how to draft contracts, and therefore many lawyers are not good at drafting contracts...

primary day

Posted on February 19, 2008
How in the world does the city lose someone's voter registration information?Okay, okay. So it wasn't "lost". The explanation that I received was that sometimes, the city just decides to reject voter registration information - even if you use that registration information to vote on a previous occasion...

i've had it up to here with winter

Posted on February 14, 2008
Is it just me, or doesn't "clear your sidewalks" mean that there shouldn't be a three inch thick icy, slushy mess covering your sidewalks? Unfortunately, around my neighborhood (and the University), it seems that "clear your sidewalks" just means to brush off the sidewalk in an eighteen-inch-wide path that a wheelchair could get down (if the person in the wheelchair didn't mind the bumpy ride provided by the layers of ice and packed snow that no one wants to bother clearing)...

chickens are made to be fried

Posted on February 13, 2008
Maybe I'm just a prude, but there's something mildly disconcerting about listening to my somewhat-elderly First Amendment professor discuss the obscenity-related cases. Especially when he comes out with stuff like this:"It's normal sexual behavior if someone uses a feather...

super letdown

Posted on February 03, 2008
I've decided that the best part of the Super Bowl was seeing T.J. Thyne in a cars.com commercial. Anything involving Hodgins from "Bones" makes me a happy camper...As for the rest of the game? Since I'm fairly certain that this is neither (a) a nightmare, or (b) a parallel world that I can't escape without some sort of pocket Simon-looking device provided by The Doctor, I'll be actively trying to repress this memory...

the beginning of the end

Posted on January 22, 2008
My last semester in law school has finally started.One of my professors today asked everyone to go around the room and explain why they're taking the class.And, you know me - I firmly believe that honesty is always the best policy. So instead of coming up with some crap explanation for why I want to learn a particular subject, I told the class the truth:"I'm in this class because the materials cost less than $100...

it'd be awesome if the bookmart sold used textbooks

Posted on January 12, 2008
I just dropped a class for next semester simply because I didn't feel like shelling out $130 for brand-new materials. I'm pretty sure that this signifies yet another new low in my law school career. Then again, I could just try to pass this off as me standing up for the principle that, since my tuition payments cover waaaaaaaay more than the value of the education I'm receiving (including the quality of the law school facilities), my books should be comped...

the common-sense train has left the station

Posted on December 05, 2007
So yesterday I decided that it would be a good idea for me to dig my car out of the ice before the next batch of snow fell.After chipping away at the four inch-deep pile of ice/snow that surrounded my tires, it was time to tackle the windows. And where was my ice scraper?Stupidly, I put it in the trunk...

honesty is the best policy, even in class

Posted on November 28, 2007
A paraphrase of something that actually happened in class this morning: Professor: [Dangerous Mind], do you want to play the defense attorney for this?Me: No.Professor: Well, too bad. ...a few minutes later... Professor: So, [DM], do you really not want to be the defense attorney?Me: No...

i could really go for some turducken right now

Posted on November 20, 2007
I'm flying to Phoenix tomorrow to spend Thanksgiving break with my sister. Of course, since I'm flying from Madison, that must mean that I'm flying through O'Hare.* And, as I'm sure CNN and every major network news will be telling us over the next few days, O'Hare is bound to have monstrous flight delays due to whatever wintry mix of crap is falling from the skies...

fun with homophones

Posted on November 08, 2007
So when I got back to the law school from my daily trip to Starbucks, I heard some sort of metallic sound coming from the heel of my right boot. I look down at my shoe, and the sole on my little skinny boot heel fell off onto the floor. I'm pretty much convinced that this is symbolic of what the law school has done to my soul over two and a half years.

things i did to stay awake

Posted on November 07, 2007
What I did in class today: -- Shopped for sweaters on bananarepublic.com.-- Read up on the latest (non-)dealings in the Writers' Guild of America strike.-- Worked on the motion I have due in class tomorrow.-- Looked for classes to take next semester. (Seriously, it's really hard to try and decide which crap is least...

updateage

Posted on October 29, 2007
So where have I been over the last ten days? Well... **Birthday. Yes, I turned 26 last weekend. Did I have a good time? Yeah. Did I get to do what I really wanted to do for my birthday? No. But oh well. I did have a very lovely dinner on my birthday after a fun trip to the corn maze, so I can't complain too much...

i hope this question isn't on the texas bar exam

Posted on October 18, 2007
I'm watching this week's "South Park" for the second time now, and there's one thing I just can't get past.Cartman and Kyle had this contract. If they did not see a leprechaun, Cartman owed Kyle $10. If they did see a leprechaun, Kyle had to suck Cartman's balls...

the end must be near

Posted on October 15, 2007
I went to Career Services today to ask about the best way to find a job in Austin.They were actually - dare I say it - helpful. No questions about my grades, no telling me that I'd be better off just looking for a job as a cashier at Target. Just them telling me the best avenues through which to get what I want...

this (and ann coulter) are why I don't watch the news.

Posted on October 14, 2007
I was watching something about school shootings other night on Anderson Cooper, but never wrote about it. Since it's Saturday night, and I'm sitting at home watching last night's "Men in Trees" that I TiVoed*, I think it's about time to write about it...

the best show on television

Posted on October 10, 2007
Is anyone out there watching "I Love New York 2" on VH1? Because if you're not, you should be. It's hilarious. Meanwhile, this season, Sister Patterson (New York's mother) brought on a few upstanding (read: rich) gentlemen to tempt her daughter. Two of these men are lawyers...

is "indian summer" still politically correct?

Posted on October 08, 2007
...then again, I don't really care if it is. The temperatures here in Wisconsin over the weekend reached 90 degrees. It was so hot in my poorly-ventilated apartment that I couldn't get to sleep until about 4:30 this morning. (And yes, for some reason, I showed up to my 9:00am class...

where'd i put my 'role of the prosecutor' cliff's notes?

Posted on October 03, 2007
I have a (very short, max 5 pages) paper due tomorrow.The paper is supposed to discuss "the ideal prosecutor", based on my summer experiences and what we've discussed in class over the last four weeks.Would've been nice if I had known that that would be the topic before I spent the three weeks before receiving the topic not paying attention...

one step closer

Posted on September 28, 2007
At least I don't have to work on finding other plans for next Saturday night...Go Cubs Go!

musical interlude

Posted on September 26, 2007
This video pretty much says everything that I've been trying to say with this blog for the last 22 months...except more awesomely.

last resort

Posted on September 24, 2007
from the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel...Yes, that is a goat farmer from Wisconsin at Wrigley this past Saturday. With a goat. Because even with Prince Fielder and Ryan Braun, Milwaukee needs a curse on the team ahead of them just to make the playoffs.

paying attention in class won't help me understand it anyway

Posted on September 24, 2007
For those of you who saw me walking around the law school this morning.... yes, I was barefoot. And no, I don't care. I bought new flats over the weekend because I wanted shoes that were stylish, yet conducive to the mile-and-a-half walk home from school (i...

what i'll be thinking about for the next week (or two)

Posted on September 23, 2007
NLDS Home Game #1, Aisle 219, Row 7, Seat 11.Now all I need is for the Cubs to keep winning (or for the Brewers to keep losing) this week so I actually get to use that playoff ticket.Classes? Huh? What are those?

no matter how long it takes, no matter how far

Posted on September 20, 2007
Has anyone else seen that Nike commercial with Shawne Merriman of the San Diego Chargers running through all sorts of different weather patterns tackling offensive players from various teams? Can I just say that that commercial bugs the crap out of me for one very specific reason: the music playing in the commercial is the same piece of music that plays in "Last of the Mohicans" when Daniel Day-Lewis (and his hair) go charging up that mountain in North Carolina (okay, in the movie it's supposed to be, like, upstate New York, but I think the movie was shot near Asheville) after Madeleine Stowe and Jodhi May, who have been kidnapped by the indians that aren't Mohicans (they're what, Huron?)...

now that i think about it...

Posted on September 20, 2007
Next time I decide to go to a night game at Wrigley on a weeknight, I'm skipping class the next day.Note that I'd rather stop going to class than stop going to games...particularly if those games have similar outcomes to last night's game. Man, was it sweet to see the Cubs win that one and keep their hold on first place...

stretch run

Posted on September 19, 2007
I'll admit it - I haven't been paying attention at all today. I've been sitting in class with my stomach in knots as I twitch uncontrollably.Why?Because there are only ten games left in baseball's regular season, and my Cubs are thisclose to taking the NL Central title...

your dentist's name is crentist?

Posted on September 18, 2007
I had a dentist appointment scheduled for yesterday morning at 10; in order to go, I was planning on getting up around 8:30 and skipping my 9:00 class. At 7:45 I woke to the sound of my phone ringing. It was my dentist, calling to tell me that the hygienist was sick and asking me to reschedule the appointment...

quick poll

Posted on September 08, 2007
Michigan is currently getting the snot kicked out of them by Oregon (39-7 with 2:30 left in the game). Is this:(a) Funny(b) One of the most hilarious things to be seen on television. Ever.(c) Excellent news for the Badgers(d) Kind of pathetic, in an "Oh, look at Britney's latest attempt at a comeback" sort of way(e) The end of Lloyd Carr's career(f) Some combination of all of the above

once bitten, twice shy

Posted on September 05, 2007
I made the mistake of getting up to go to my 9am class this morning. Yes, I know getting up that early for a class is always a mistake. But today was particularly mistakey. (That is a word. I made it up.)There has been so much rain around here the past few weeks that mosquitoes are everywhere...